Humility- something I’ve always coupled with pride. You’re either prideful or you’re humble, plain and simple. I’ve never considered myself to be prideful person so I must be humble, right?! The Lord, and his actual humility, allows me to continually search out what humility should look like.
When given the time, my nature is to plan. And plan and plan and plan. Usually I would see being too busy or distracted as a negative thing. In the last few weeks a new perspective has shown me how the Lord wants to work though me. It’s allowed me to put more of my dependence on the Lord. Beat the Drum was busy this year, in a good way. Having done the program a few times in the past I had a plan in my own mind going into the week. As per usual God has his plan, that differed from the plan I had. Going into the teaching week we had prepared as if we, as partners, would have our own classes. We ended up changing things right on the fly. We had 4 class rooms to show Beat the Drum. The next day teaching began and we were thrown another loop, there were less students than even the day prior. So on the fly we created new teaching groups. The days following the Lord did his thing. Having to switch things and shoot from the hip, as the saying goes, the Holy Spirit led and instilled his timing in each of us. Far better than what any of us could have planned, the students were attentive and completely receptive to what the Lord spoke through us. Going into the week my prayers were to reach the students in any way that the Lord would want to, start a spark in their relationship with the father, but selfishly I also want to be able to personally connect with the girls. No matter what happened I knew that Gods plan was above all better than anything that we could imagine. The teaching and connecting with our group far surpassed my own hopes and predictions. The week looked nothing like I would have pictured, thank goodness. Gods plans are so great. Who knew that when I get out of the way he shows us what’s fully capable in being a vessel.
The power of prayer is incredible. Learning to grow in prayer with the power of the Holy Spirit continues to get better and better. I’m finding that is one of my favorite parts of life with the Lord, it’s never a stand still, there is always room to learn more. Our week in Lesotho was covered in prayer, day and night, and it was evident. Watching the Lord answer our prayers right before our eyes is something I will never forget. Praying for situations I felt inadequate in taught me another level of this humility thing. Having the Holy Spirit completely lead my prayers isn’t something new but knowing the actual words that I use aren’t what matter took a new significance. The Lord placed me in new situations of prayer, situations where I didn’t really understand what was always going on. But yet in these situations no matter what my words were he taught me he was going to work through them, right or wrong. Seeing the Lord answer prayers of healing and deliverance right in front of me was overwhelming. I’m still processing and trying to comprehend some of these moments from the past weeks.
Even as I write now, I know this is what the Lord wants me to write about and I can’t find the words. I look for my own words from his idea. When I submit my weakness to him, even in simple tasks, he comes through. So why does it take me endless time and thought to get to this point… I realize that it’s a learning and a growing process. Something I will never be complete in. Having the humility to admit my weakness in such areas, it opens up the door to so many more areas that I need to humble myself. When looking at it like a task it seems endless. Learning to look at humbling myself as a privilege of giving my problems to the Lord. He says to cast all our cares upon him because he cares for us. Early on in my relationship with the Lord I wanted to be at a certain point in my walk before I would be willing to admit my weakness, I wanted to conquer my battles myself. Writing it now, it makes no sense.
Finding out that true humility is an act of surrender. Surrendering to the Lord’s will not my own. Crazy concept here people, when I actually ask the Lord to work and submit my will to his own, it happens. Finally pushing aside my own agenda and letting the Lord work through me. Once again the idea that seem so normal and logical in my mind tend to be the ones that take me the longest to actually realize. It’s a privilege to be a work in progress, HIS work in progress.
|ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Nikkie Brink • 2016 International Immersion Intern